I don't mean to start tweeting my life here, but a bitch just came to me and I have to let it out.
So there I am. Just minding my biznass cruising my, sleek and well oiled, shopping cart up and down the organic isles of the local market district, and then I realize something. "HOLY FUCK," I said to the middle aged woman next to me. "I totally need pep jack express if I expect to make a dank as fuck sandwich." She nodded her head in agreement.
So Obvi I jetted on over to the cheese section. When I arrived I was in shock, pissed and worried. There must have been 6,000 different kinds of cheeses form wall to wall, floor to ceiling. I started to dig. I ripped through shelf after shelf just searching for that white goodness sprinkled with bits of whole pepper....Nothing. MOTHERFUCKINGEMPTYHANDED!!! Yup. Nothing.
So this goes out to all those hippie veggie vegan soy milk loving self absorbed assholes. Ok, So maybe I don't catch every 5 AM show on NPR, but don't punish me by causing an inflated demand for assorted cheeses. Were you there for market tank of 2007?...that shit causes problems. There is no way in hell that that much cheese is necessary.
But when it's all said and done, I just want my pepper jack. So take yo' bitch ass cheeses and leave the ever so versatile pepper jack out of your mess. It doesn't deserve to be covered by a lesser cheese- I don't deserve that.
Much Love,
Capt. Win
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